I Bring Your Paychecks to You

Glory Glory how peculiar

Glory Glory how peculiar

I bring Your paychecks to You

Verse 1

The teachers say “they know us”

I cry, “ not enough to pay”

“Marketer, why are you worrying me?”

“‘Cause our numbers are down today.”

“Well just go out and find them fool,”

“What do I tell them friend?,”

“Tell them we know what we do”

Chorus

I am in the admission office.

And marketing is what I do,

My job never stops and

I work the whole year through

Verse 2

“They should see how great you are

With every single child you teach

They’ll be amazed to see your work

Versus always hearing me preach.”

“OK,” said the wise teacher,”

if they really have to see,”

“Tell them only bother us

Between 9 and 9:03.”

Chorus

I am in the admission office.

And marketing is what I do,

My enrolling never stops and

I bring your paychecks to you.

Verse 3

“How about the kids I enroll,

Don’t you want the match right”

“We can serve any nice, smart kid,

Keep their parents out of sight.”

“I don’t want to take you for granted,

Your work is mostly best

But for our weary customer you must pass the test.”

 Chorus 

I am in the admission office.

And marketing is what I do,

My job never stops and

I work the whole year through

Verse 4

“You admission folks speak heresy

By saying ‘customer’ to me.

I joined this great school

To teach and to be free.

If they just do not want us,

That’s a choice they can make.

We ain’t changing nothing let them all eat cake.”

Chorus

I am in the admission office.

And marketing is what I do,

My enrolling never stops and

I bring your paychecks to you.

Verse 5

The school is now closing,

The faculty has won.

We’re all looking for new jobs,

‘Cause customers are none.

If I’ve learned any lesson,

You learn it from me.

If there’s no support for marketing,

Leave and be free.

Chorus

Glory Glory how peculiar

Glory Glory how peculiar

Glory Glory how peculiar

Will independent schools march on!